Jesse Everett loved being with his family - sifting through garage sale treasures with his grandma, shooting hoops with his grandpa and goofing around with his brother.
His mother, Glenda Everett, said he was “awesome.”
So when the 14-year-old killed himself on Nov. 30, 1996, his family was shocked.
“When Jesse died, I thought my life was over,” Glenda Everett said as her eyes filled with tears.
Though Jesse never seemed “depressed,” his mother said she can now see the subtle signs he gave her. But at the time she didn’t know enough about suicide to correctly interpret the warnings.
“Suicide is 95 percent preventable,” she said. “It’s all about talking about it and breaking the stigma. Saying the word ‘suicide’ does not cause the action.”
Everett is now the Michigan coordinator of the Yellow Ribbon Program, and is working to educate the public about the reality of suicide. The program educates people of the warning signs of suicide.
Unlike other diseases, suicidal tendencies are harder to categorize, said psychology senior Sarah Kline, a volunteer crisis counselor and center coordinator for The Listening Ear, 1017 E. Grand River Ave.
Generally, a person is “at risk” if they exhibit two or more of a list of dozens of symptoms, Kline said. Symptoms include depression, hopelessness, changes in eating and sleeping patterns, a loss of interest in life, abrupt personality changes, hostility, drug and alcohol use and sexual promiscuity.
Kline said the most important gift individuals can offer to a suicidal friend is support.
“By supporting them, you can help validate their feelings and encourage them to get help,” she said, adding people need to understand the signs of suicide and know how to react.
The Yellow Ribbon Program focuses on teaching suicide prevention while destroying existing stereotypes.
Program members participated in Youth Suicide Prevention Week, which commenced Sunday with statewide ceremonies, including a candlelight vigil on the lawn of the Capitol on Sunday night.
Memory quilts hung from a clothesline near the stairs, displaying photographs of suicide victims and notes from their families. Another quilt, signed by vigil attendees and bearing the names of suicide victims, will hang in the Capitol for the next week.
The name of Brian Walker, who died in 1999, is among the list of victims on the quilt. His sister Stacie Miller attended the vigil with the Yellow Ribbon Program of Wayne County.
“I would not want anyone to suffer the loss I have suffered from my brother’s suicide,” Walker said as her voice cracked. “If I can help anyone, that’s what I want to give back on behalf of my brother.”
Amy Hughes closed her eyes and clutched her melting candle as she listened to the reading of a list of suicide victims. When she heard her brother’s name, she released her yellow balloon and watched it disappear into the night sky.
The Bay City Central High School choir director drove to Lansing with a group of students Sunday to sing at the vigil. Hughes’ brother committed suicide in 1998.
“He was probably one of the greatest people I’ve ever met,” Hughes said as her eyes filled with tears. “I don’t understand it.”
For more information on the Michigan Yellow Ribbon Program, visit www.michiganyellowribbon.org.
Elissa Englund can be reached at englunde@msu.edu.
