Friday, December 3, 2021

Attorney General Dana Nessel apologizes for drinking too much at the MSU-U-M game

November 11, 2021
<p>Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel speaks during a press conference at the G. Mennen Williams Building in Lansing on Feb. 21, 2019.</p>

Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel speaks during a press conference at the G. Mennen Williams Building in Lansing on Feb. 21, 2019.

Photo by Anntaninna Biondo | The State News

We’ve all been there.

Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel (D), a graduate of the University of Michigan, released a statement Wednesday about an “incident” that occurred at the MSU-UMich football game on Oct. 30 — she dubbed it “TailgateGate.”

Nessel lamented her lack of planning for the long day of tailgating. 

“Before the big game, I attended a tailgate on an empty stomach,” Nessel said. “Much to my surprise, MSU (tailgates) tend to have more alcohol than food, so I thought it seemed like a good idea to eat (two) Bloody Marys, since as long as you put enough vegetables in them, it's practically a salad.”

She goes on to say that while she was able to attend the game for some time, her friends “recommended that I leave so as to prevent me from vomiting on any of my constituents (polling consistently shows "Roman showers" to be unpopular among most demographics).”

Nessel attached an image showing her slumped over in the stands, a feeling that many of us have experienced when our undefeated football team isn’t doing so hot.

She also praised her friends and wife, who got her home safe and provided plenty of water and Tylenol for “what she knew would be a skull-crushing hangover the next day.”

Nessel also pointed out the timing of this statement of apology.

“Normally I would ask my trusted friend and communications savant Kelly Rossman-McKinney for advice on how to best handle this crisis, but she died last night, so I can't,” Nessel wrote.

She ended her statement by asking for forgiveness.

“I am human,” Nessel said in the statement. “Sometimes I screw up. This was definitely one of those times. My apologies to the entire state of Michigan for this mishap, but especially that Michigan fan sitting behind me. Some things you can't un-see.”

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