— TK

Dear TK,

Thanks for writing, and if I could apologize for the part of humanity who feels it is just and right to do these things to others, I would. 

We have a society that is obsessed with weight, body image, dieting and looks, and, frankly, it is time we all just stop.

The focus on this concept we call “fat” is generated by a culture and an industry obsessed with the notion that being thin equals being healthy. It has put tremendous pressure on people to lose weight that is both unrealistic and unhealthy. The notion driven by the cosmetic, drug, diet and fitness industries that make a fortune extolling fear and discrimination.

The truth is that when it comes to weight there is mounting and sufficient evidence that diets fail to support long-term change and they can exact severe costs on physical and psychological health. Unfortunately, this data has failed to stop an industry that continues to profit off the fear, even though many operate under the premise that they are “helping” you.

Prejudice, plain and simple, is the answer to why individuals in our culture feel they can perpetrate such acts of verbal abuse on others who do not meet their perception of a healthy size. We refer to this as “weightism,” similar to such prejudices such as racism, sexism and ageism. Unfortunately, because of our preoccupation with thinness we have actually made this prejudice an acceptable one. 

Even the words we associate with increased size, although derogatory, have become acceptable. Think for a minute about the word obese, which is more of a medical term for the word “fat.” We use such adjectives as “morbidly” sometimes when we refer to someone who appears to be significantly over their “normal” body weight. This term means gruesome, disgusting or diseased. Only with size would we see such an adjective be used to describe someone who is believed to be significantly above normal. You would never see it used to describe race, such as “morbidly white,” or sexual orientation, such as “morbidly straight,” or political persuasion, as in “morbidly Republican” … hmmm … nevermind. You get my point.

Health can really be found at every size. Once we accept this we can start to accept ourselves for who we are and others for who they are. Let’s just stop thinking about weight as a defining factor and choose to enjoy and be enriched by the variety in body shapes and sizes in the same way that we are taught to respect differences in religion, language, ethnicity, sexual preference, etc. 

Try not to be put off track by people talking about the relationship of weight to health. Most of that hysteria has been greatly exaggerated and the more that a person likes who they are the healthier they are likely to be. If you are interested, there are a lot of resources and even a class on campus to help students move in this type of direction. Just e-mail me for the info.

Take solace in the thought that the only time size should matter is when it refers to how much we care about each other and the level of service we give to each other. This is one time I would advise us all to “supersize it.” Peace, love dove.

— Dr. D.

Dennis Martell, Ph.D., is a coordinator of Olin Heath Center education. E-mail him your questions at dennis.martell@ht.msu.edu