A miniskirt? Too provocative. Toss it to the ground. An ankle-length gray number looks too matronly. Throw it on the bed. Scarf? The black shirt is nice, but not with that skirt. A vast collection of shoes to choose from, and even the Chanel pumps don't seem quite right. Repeat until somewhat satisfied. End result? Terrible date. Why even bother?
In "Bad Dates" at BoarsHead Theatre, 425 S. Grand Ave. in Lansing, Haley Walker is a New York restaurateur and single mother who is just getting back into the dating scene. In a sequence of bad dates, Walker is set up by her mother with a pompous Columbia University law professor — he turns out to be gay.
In another disaster date, a man says that her attire makes her look old. He goes through every item on the menu at a French bistro and expresses his disdain for buttery cuisine. He talks about his cholesterol, his colon and how he should watch what he eats. He then boasts that his doctor told him his body is younger than his age and orders the most fattening item on the menu, the Coquille St. Jacques. When Walker realizes the date is doomed, they talk about the woman he is still in love with, and she argues that she broke up with him because of an insane movie metaphor.
And when she finally seems to find a man she likes, he deceives her.
Maggie Carney is absolutely wonderful as Walker. The first act starts off on the slow side, but Carney manages to draws the audience in with her natural knack for comedy. Any hesitation you might have about a one-person show will dissolve by the end of the first scene when the character of Walker becomes so familiar, so genuine.
"The thing that I really like about the play is the character is so real. She's down-home philosophical," Carney said.
This is Carney's first one-woman show. She connects with her audience — you laugh with her, feel her desperation, rejection, love for her daughter and the glimmer of hope she retains throughout the play.
"I think this is something women can relate to — men will like it, too," Carney said.
Walker's dilemma is typical of the "Sex and The City" era — discovering where dating fits in between career, a social life and family. She also struggles between the notion of being swept off her feet by a knight in shining armor or finding an equal partner.
"I think it can be the same thing. With a soul mate, there is this feeling of somebody I can work with, and we both take action, not just him taking action," Carney said.
Carney lives in Chicago and has been acting most of her life. She's been in films, radio and TV commercials and has taught, but Carney says nothing compares to being on stage.
"It's that we're breathing the same air; there's an energy you can feel from the audience, especially in this show," she said. "It's so much fun to see the people, see their reactions. That is the thing about theater — we're all in this together."
