One afternoon in July 2011, while packing for my freshman year at Michigan State, I stumbled across my baby book. Taking a break, I mindlessly flipped through its pages, reminiscing about the times when the baby teeth and tiny locks of hair were a part of me. My stroll down memory lane took a strange turn when I came to the page dedicated to my biological father and infant me.
Call me the black sheep, the FedEx baby, the milkman’s kid; I’ve heard them all. In my mind, my blond hair has been ruining the uniformity of family portraits for years. I stand out in my entirely brunette family, and much to my distaste, strangers typically don’t hesitate to point out that my hair color doesn’t coincide.
My mom and my biological dad weren’t ever married and split up shortly after I was born. While my mom took on both parental roles gracefully, that didn’t ease the awkwardness of trying to explain my out-of-wedlock birth to strangers.
Eventually, there came a point in my life when I got tired of fabricating excuses to explain why my appearance is so drastically different from my younger sister. This was around the same time I stumbled across my dad’s name and a thought occurred to me.
Nowadays, everybody is on Facebook — and I mean everybody. In my head, I reasoned that if I was able to find my out-of-state elementary school classmates online, there had to be at least a small chance the mystery man himself has a profile as well. I searched his name, not getting my hopes up that I’d find him there.
But all of a sudden, boom.
With the click of a mouse, there he was.
At first, I hesitated to friend request him because he was, essentially, a complete stranger. I had never even spoken to him before, and for all I knew, he preferred it that way. In the end, I decided adding him would not be too presumptuous; I am his daughter, after all.
I sent the request, and to my dismay, months passed with no response. I shrugged off my disappointment and set my sights on my upcoming freshman year.
Fast forward a few months — here I am, studying for finals in my crammed dorm room. Like any dedicated student, I logged onto my Facebook account, only to be received by a friend request confirmation and a message from the man himself. Needless to say, my studying had ceased for the evening.
The two of us immediately began corresponding, and I even had an opportunity to meet him over this past spring break. Although our relationship may not be perfect, it’s nice to finally be able to say it is a work in progress.
There are a lot of different ways I could have handled meeting my biological dad but, for the first time in my life, I let the situation play out. This past spring, when I arrived at our decided meeting place, I left my preconceived opinions behind, and I definitely do not regret it.
Support student media!
Please consider donating to The State News and help fund the future of journalism.
Discussion
Share and discuss “Relationship built from social media ” on social media.
