Flat out, we’re all a little bit gay.
The guy who gives you your coffee at Sparty’s has had nudie dreams about a guy from his IM soccer team. The girl you sit next to in your IAH class likes to make out with girls on the weekend. One time, your grandma looked at a Playboy magazine and thought a pinup was hotter than grandpa on their honeymoon. And, news flash, the guy at Sparty’s still counts your change right, the girl in IAH still lets you cheat off her homework and grandma will still give you money on your birthday.
It’s all pretty boring — until people formally call themselves “homosexual” and want to get married.
Sadly, it’s a new age of hate that is taking its victims throughout the United States. Only this time, it seems that homophobes are becoming the new racists. And not even liberal states are safe, as California voters approved Proposition 8 — which took on the name “Prop H8te.” The decision is a yo-yo attack at the state Supreme Court’s decision to do away with previous laws banning gay marriage, saying that they violated the state constitution. But like a mean joke, Proposition 8 has now passed — banning same-sex marriage once again.
Although a few million absentee ballots have not yet been counted, the initiative has approved the ban on gay marriage 52.5 to 47.5 percent. Nothing has enraged me more in recent history.
Thankfully, Prop. 8 haters have already filed a petition asking the California Supreme Court to strike down the ban. According to the Los Angeles Times, about 18,000 same-sex couples who have wed in the past four months will now have their marriage possibly voided. Yep. Stamped out like a bad check. Thought you were married? Just kidding! Loved those pictures of Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi frolicking in a green garden? Ha, now they’re fake! This terrifying omen is bigger than just California — as it could set the scene for gays in every one of the other 49 states.
Many “Yes on 8” folks were worried about the “societal and family” issues related to gay marriage. I hate to break it to you, parents, but little Sarah is going to find out about lesbians on “Grey’s Anatomy” whether you like it or not. She might even see that gay guy on “Two and a Half Men” and think he’s funny. Oh, the horror! It’s come to the point where you have to ban your kid from watching antenna channels if you want to shelter them from love. Gay parents can be just as rule abiding and family loving as any one of the churchgoers who doesn’t let his or her kids play video games.
This isn’t about abortions or taxes or baby seals. This is about being able to marry someone you love.
Wait, I thought love was a good thing? Yeah, yeah, the Bible supposedly said “no” to the homos, but isn’t Jesus all about love? It’s too bad Jesus isn’t a registered voter in California (kind of hard to do after you die), because he would have voted for love. And because he loves that show “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.”
The United States’ divorce rate is one of the highest in the world. Straight people make stupid decisions to marry each other all the time, so why hold that back from gay people? If Marcus wants to go out and marry Zack after a whirlwind weekend in Las Vegas, let him. This won’t affect you, me or anyone’s children. It might leave Marcus with a bruised reputation and Zack with an awful hangover, but hey, that’s why this wonderful country of ours has do-overs.
Those who approve of Prop. 8 are simply fearful of living in a world where differences are accepted. They’re scared of having two dads at a parent-teacher conference, regardless that those two dads care just as much about their child as every one of those mom and dad couples do. They’re scared of being invited to Aunt Maureen’s wedding to her college roommate, even if Aunt Maureen and her fiancé are way more compatible than every other straight couple in the room. They’re scared of their children possibly coming out of the closet some day and marrying the same-sex person of their dreams.
While the ban is a huge step back for human rights, I eagerly beg Californians not to quit. Question the system. Band together with gays, straights, transgenders, bisexuals, grandmas, grandpas, dogs, cats and chameleons alike — simply do not take “hate” for an answer.
Besides, I know you’ll persevere. Because there’s nothing more determined than a queen on a mission.
Thea Neal is a State News staff writer. Reach her at nealthea@gmail.com.
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