1. Candor First, figure out if the relationship is even eligible for this type of breakup. Most self-respecting people wouldn’t do this after a relationship has crossed the first day mark, but to be safe, let’s make the first month the universal cut-off for every relationship. If it’s been a month, suck it up and make the phone call or schedule the coffee date.
2. The quick and the dead If you’re going to do this, be as quick as possible. You only have 140-160 characters as it is, but get to the point as quickly as you can. “This isn’t working out, it would be best for both if we call things off before things get worse” is a good start. A simple “Won’t C U L8TR b/c its over” works as well. If you’re feeling particularly sentimental, you might want to add an “I’m sorry” at the end. Of course, that’s optional.
3. Stay the course If you’re sticking with the text message theme, make sure you’re committed to go all the way. Don’t take their phone calls, don’t respond to their e-mails — don’t give them anything to get their hopes up. The less they hear from you, the quicker they’ll get over things if they really know it’s over. If you have to pick up the phone, don’t mess around. Tell them to stop calling and reiterate your text message: It’s O.V.E.R.
4. Blocking text messages Let’s face it — breaking up via text message is really a low thing to do. You probably left your former significant other in a state of confusion with plenty of unanswered questions. Since you already made the decision to save yourself the face-to-face confrontation, you’ll probably want to go all the way and have his or her phone number blocked from text messaging you. You can do this either through your phone itself or by calling your service provider, depending on the phone.
5. Blocking yourself Sure, it’s a hassle for you to take different routes to class in the morning, or avoiding you and your ex’s favorite spots for a few weeks, but if you’re not into confrontations — and if you’re reading this and actually considering it, we know you’re not — it’s a necessary step. It wouldn’t hurt to have a good pair of running shoes or a football helmet on hand in case you do run into the ex.
—Compiled by Mike Blasky
Support student media!
Please consider donating to The State News and help fund the future of journalism.
Discussion
Share and discuss “In the know” on social media.
