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Spreading Kindness

Week of kindness aims to spread joy in memory of Charlie Waller

February 12, 2015
<p>Four-year-old East Lansing resident Charlie Waller plays with his godmother and Wisconsin resident Carrie Green on Friday morning, Oct. 26, 2012, at the Waller's home. Waller was diagnosed with diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma, which is an inoperable brain stem cancer that afflicts mostly young children. Natalie Kolb/The State News</p>

Four-year-old East Lansing resident Charlie Waller plays with his godmother and Wisconsin resident Carrie Green on Friday morning, Oct. 26, 2012, at the Waller's home. Waller was diagnosed with diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma, which is an inoperable brain stem cancer that afflicts mostly young children. Natalie Kolb/The State News

This week is International Random Acts of Kindness Week, in honor of Charlie. Art For Charlie, a foundation created with the purpose of supporting families who have lost a child, is hosting the event.

In order to carry on Charlie’s kindness, people are encouraged to perform and share kind acts. The foundation hosts annual art shows which generate roughly $40,000 each time toward the cause.

Growing up

Everything seemed fine with Charlie until just a few weeks before the diagnosis. Charlie had a severe language delay, a common occurrence among children. It usually goes away, but with his case, it never improved. Charlie had difficulty walking, jumping, sleeping and partaking in other activities young children naturally do.

On April 1, 2011, Charlie’s parents took him to have an MRI. Within 15 minutes, John Waller said the doctor informed him and his wife there was a very large mass in the middle of Charlie’s brain.

Charlie was diagnosed with diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma, a type of cancer that is nearly impossible to survive. The tumor develops in the pons portion of the brainstem and affects the nervous system significantly. The median survival time for children affected by this is under 12 months. Charlie lived for just over 32 months.

Charlie was placed on several high doses of steroids and received six weeks of radiation. As a result of this treatment, the tumor shrunk and Charlie was able to communicate more clearly.

John and Abigail Waller wanted to ensure that Charlie would enjoy his life and not suffer from the pain of the tumor. They enrolled Charlie in preschool at Marble Elementary School and he developed great relationships with his fellow students.

“The children at Marble rallied around him superbly. After he died, classroom after classroom said, ‘What do they remember most?’ And it was how kind he was,” John Waller said. “I cannot recall a single incident in his entire life that was just unpleasant.”

Due to his treatment, Charlie began losing his hair and would wear a hat to school. Charlie hated how some people were looked at differently because of their appearance. In a show of support, Marble Elementary School instilled a “hat day” every Wednesday. To this day, students still participate in the themed day every week.

The amount of care Charlie possessed is remarkable, John Waller said. He cared deeply about other people, as well as animals. Killing mosquitoes and spiders was out of the question in the Waller household because of Charlie’s “enormous love for everything.”

He was mature for his age and was able to sense pain in others, his parents said. He did not like his parents worrying about his health and being saddened by it. At a very young age, not even 5 years old, he had lost sight in his right eye. He told a family friend about this, but swore them to secrecy because he “didn’t want mom and dad to get upset.”

Week of Kindness

Charlie’s life became an inspiration for people everywhere. John and Abigail Waller created a charity in his name called Art for Charlie. Established in 2012, the foundation has evolved since his death on Dec. 5, 2013. It advocates support for families who have lost a child and ensures families can provide the proper care throughout their child’s life.

Art for Charlie has created the “International Random Acts of Kindness Week” which began Feb. 9. This kindness campaign originally began at Marble Elementary, Charlie’s old school. Teachers encourage students to be kind and promote friendly behavior.

“The most important thing is spreading the idea of random acts of kindness — being kind for the sake of kindness, without any expectation of reward,” John Waller said. “The kindness campaign is trying to promote positive behaviors and celebrating a very fine example of empathy.”

Additionally, the foundation has created kindness cards, which are used to pass notes of kindness and are available on their website. The cards are handed out to people who perform a kind act, and are passed along when one sees another being kind.

The week of kindness is a way to continue to honor Charlie.

“The effect he had on his peers, parents and community is truly amazing,” Tali Hylen, the director of public relations for the foundation and a family friend, said. Art for Charlie hopes to have this event be just the beginning of an international campaign of positivity.

When performing a kind act, #CourageToBeKind should be shared on social media, along with the kind act that was done.

Advertising junior Emilie Bischoff works as an intern for Art for Charlie.

“Being kind is as simple as having good manners and being respectful,” Bischoff said. “I am delighted to honor Charlie’s life through a week, but hopefully a lifetime, of kindness.”

Taking action

People are encouraged to participate in this kindness event, and also support Art for Charlie.

One example of Art for Charlie’s actions involved a young child who loved taking baths. Unfortunately, the family’s plumbing system could not support a bathtub, so Art for Charlie came in and paid for proper plumbing at the household.

Art for Charlie works to make sure proper pediatric hospice is provided for children dealing with cancer and terminal illness. Charlie received tremendous care locally at Sparrow Hospital, and the Waller family hopes others receive this care as well.

A big issue is what happens to a family after the death of a child. Hylen said, “When a child is sick, people rally around (the) family for support. When a child dies, people don’t really know what to do anymore.”

Art for Charlie was created with this idea in mind, helping families deal with financial, emotional and social stress.

Currently, the foundation raises money through art shows, stating that it is “a beautiful way to fight the darkness.” Art shows are held annually at the Marriott hotel in East Lansing.

The next show is Nov. 6 and all artwork is accepted — amateur or professional.

The money raised goes toward helping families anywhere in Michigan who are in financial difficulty because they have lost a child.

“We wanted to do something that would bring the community around Charlie. We wanted people to be involved,” John Waller said.

Detailed information about Art for Charlie, and what you can do to help out, can be found on the website: www.artforcharlie.com.

Discussion

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