It’s super annoying when that lady brings in her jumbo purse that is about to bust all over the person in front of her. Those kinds of bags already were prohibited. The new item slapped with the contraband label? Wristlets.

As a member of the women’s Varsity Swimming and Diving team here at MSU, I had the privilege of heading down on the field with my fellow student-athletes to form the tunnel for the football team. As we were getting lined up to head into the gate, one of my teammates spotted a poster with some new regulations on it. It said purses of all kinds won’t be allowed.

As most female college students are aware, the use of small, all-in-one wristlets, coin purses and ID cases are constants on campus. Smaller than most wallets and capable of carrying little more than cash, an ID, credit cards and maybe a lip balm, we figured we would all be fine with these and didn’t think much of it.

As soon as MSU Special Events staff spotted our team, tensions rose. They were shutting down all the student-athletes around us. Staff claimed these 4-by-3 inch ID cases fell under the “no-bag/no-purse policy” and they would not be able to let us in. Now you have dozens of girls scrambling to hide their wristlets down shirts, shorts, pants — ridiculous places. I came to the front after shoving my wristlet down my sister’s shorts, thinking all would be well.

They spotted my camera in its pink cover in my pocket. “Is that a camera case?” They asked me. I’m thinking to myself, “If I say ‘no,’ will she let me in?”

I could have the camera in my pocket, but it could not have the case on it. The ridiculousness of this encounter really started to blow my mind as I collected my thoughts after a sane member of the MSU Special Events staff finally let us through. I decided to take a look into the rhetoric of this new policy.

Found on the MSU football page, the new “no-bag/no-purse guidelines” are as follows:
1: “IF IT LOOKS LIKE A BAG AND IS CARRIED LIKE A BAG, IT IS A BAG!“
2: “No bags or purses are allowed inside Spartan Stadium. This includes but not limited to: no backpacks, purses of any size, camera cases, binocular cases, wallets not stored in pockets, bags, diaper bags, seat cushions with pockets that are used for storage…”
Size is no longer relevant, which undermines the gist of their argument stating the new policy will “allow for quicker entry into the stadium and more room in the seating areas.”

If my 4-by-3 inch wallet is prohibiting someone from sitting comfortably in their area, I think seat area size may be more of the problem. Without these small cases, important items such as ID’s and credit cards are falling out of people’s pockets, and fans are starting to wear cargo pants with pockets bigger than an average bag.

There is one loophole that none of the staff or signs mentioned: You can bring a one-gallon, clear plastic bag to hold all of your goodies that don’t fit in your pockets. Grab the gallon! You can fit so much stuff in a gallon bag. Unopened water bottles to save you some money, lip balm, all of the things you normally bring in your wristlet and a printed version of the “no bag/no purse policy” so you know exactly what the rules are.

My advice: wear an outfit with enough room for your stuff or bring a gallon plastic bag. Security and safety concerns should be a priority, but to suggest my Vera Bradley wristlet and pink camera cover pose a threat to seating arrangements and gate wait times is absurd.

It will take me more time to empty my pockets at the next game than it would have to unzip my 4-by-3 inch ID case. If it is truly a security issue than state that, but go back to the size restrictions as your guide for bags. It’s more objective and still limits what can be brought into the stadium.

Victoria Merritt is a State News guest columnist and political theory and constitutional democracy senior. Reach her at merrittv@msu.edu.