Inside, about 10 of Oswald's close friends and co-workers sat in her living room in a semicircle, munching on home-baked finger foods such as brownies and chip dip. Some guests eased back into the couch while others got comfy on the carpeted floor. Once fully settled in, all eyes were glued to the center of the room - but they weren't gathered to watch television or a movie.
They were at a sex toy party.
For about an hour, the women laughed, joked and talked freely about all things sex while Michelle Brittain, a consultant for the in-home sex toy party company Pure Romance Inc., stood in the middle of the group and introduced dozens of products. One by one, the items were held up and described - sometimes to oohs and ahhs, sometimes to gasps or giggles - before being passed around the semicircle to each guest.
Oswald, a school psychology graduate student, said there was no particular reason why she threw the party, although she did receive a few gag goodies to pass out at her upcoming bachelorette party. She said she just wanted to get her friends together for the event before spring semester gets hectic.
"It's fun to have girls getting together to have an opportunity to talk about things just amongst girls," she said.
Like Oswald, an increasing number of adults are turning to in-home sex toy parties as a way to hold interesting and fun gatherings among friends while exploring options for sexual health and intimacy. The companies that provide the products often sport racy names such as Passion Parties Inc. and For Your Pleasure Inc., and depending on who's hosting, the demonstrations can be women only, men only or coed. Often, the companies rely on independent consultants or sales representatives to sell their products.
Brittain, who led the product demonstrations at Oswald's gathering, has been a Pure Romance consultant for more than a year. The 32-year-old Lansing resident, who is a parole officer by day and jokes about the contrast between her two jobs, decided to pursue becoming a consultant for in-home parties after attending one herself.
"I went to a party in January (2004) and just had such a great time," she said. "I thought the products were really unique. I had been to other in-home party plans, but I just thought this was such a fun and exciting and nice setting for women to be able to look at and purchase all these romance items."
Pure Romance Inc. is currently the nation's fastest-growing in-home sex toy party plan: For the 2003 fiscal year, the company reported $30 million in sales. Men can purchase products from the company's Web site or directly from a consultant, but the actual Pure Romance parties operate under a strict ladies-only policy.
The bottom line? This isn't your grandmother's Tupperware party.
During her first year as a Pure Romance consultant, Brittain only hosted about one party each week. But now, because of more advertising exposure and boosted demand spurred by Valentine's Day coming Monday, she's recently increased the number of parties she does to three per week. Although most women who host parties fall between the ages of 25 and 45, Brittain said she's had demand from women younger and older than the average and the popularity just keeps building.
"Right now, this is a big buzz," she said. "A lot of it is just word of mouth: women finally talking to each other about this subject."
Products range from mundane bath bubbles and body glitter to riskier massage oils and edible lotions to, of course, more scandalous novelties. Guests can shell out pocket change for items as cheap as $10, or dip deep into their wallets for more pricey products up to $150. And, according to Brittain, some guests aren't afraid to make more than a few purchases - her best party sold more than $1,300 worth of products.
As a consultant, Brittain makes a percentage of the profits from each party. She said it took a little time for her to ease into the job, but now that she's grown accustomed to it, holding parties has become a good way to supplement her income.
"It's set in such a tasteful and comfortable setting. It's easy. You're just talking to women," she said.
But not everyone is completely comfortable with the idea of sex toy parties. Female sexuality, and sexuality in general, can still be sensitive and often taboo subjects.
Dennis Martell, coordinator for health education programs at Olin Health Center, has been teaching human sexuality for more than 25 years. He said sex toy parties aren't for everyone, but they can be a good chance for people to learn more about their sexuality.
"There just seems to be a lack of permission that seems to be programmed into some women, that they don't have the right to explore their sexuality," he said.
Martell said some women are more shy about their sexuality than men, and pointed to societal pressures, religion and culture as a few factors that can affect people's feelings about their own bodies.
"How often do people get to sit around, especially women, to talk about what is it that they need and what they want from sex?" he said, adding that sex toy parties can be a healthy way for women to become more comfortable with themselves.
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"You hear 'sex toy' and you think 'Oh my God, it's just going to be this place where they just demonstrate sex toys,' when really, it's talking about your body and your right to say 'no,' and if you do want to increase your pleasure or your satisfaction, here are some things you can try."
And for those who still might be squeamish about the idea, Brittain said it's important to remember that sex toy parties are meant not only to be educational but fun as well.
"I've had a lot of people just say it's done in a very tasteful manner," Brittain said. "You can't help but have a good time."
Emily Bingham is the State News music reporter. She can be reached at binghame@msu.edu
Want to host a sex toy party in your own home? Just grab your best buds and find a night when everyone's free.
Pure Romance Inc.
The goods: Lotions, massage oils, bath products, beauty products, lubricants, books and more
The guest list: Parties are intended for women only.
Bonus: Hostesses receives 10 percent of the total party sales and can use that towards purchasing products, and can also earn free incentive gifts.
On the Web: pureromance.com
Passion Parties Inc.
The goods: Lingerie, games, books, lubricants, lotions, massage oils, body sprays, perfumes and more
The guest list: Parties are intended for women only.
Bonus: Hostesses can earn free products.
On the Web: passionparties.com
Edible Ecstacy
The goods: Lingerie, novelties, lotions, lubricants, sensual kits, adult videos and more
The guest list: Parties can be single-sex or coed.
Bonus: Hosts and hostesses receive 10 percent of party sales to use towards products and can earn free incentive gifts as well.
On the Web: edibleecstasy.com
Midnight Madness
The goods: Bath products, lingerie, books, games, lubricants, massage products, videos and more
The guest list: Parties can be women-only, men-only or coed
Bonus: Hosts and hostesses can earn credit towards purchases determined by total party sales.
On the Web: midnitemadness.com
Source: The State News
• On July 28, 2004, Alabama upheld a 1998 law banning the sale of sex toys in the state, ruling the Constitution does not include a right to sexual privacy. Guns, however, can still be sold.
• In February of 2004, Joanne Webb, a former schoolteacher turned Baptist mother of three, was arrested for panhandling sex toys in her Texas home during a party. Texas law allows for the sale of sex toys as long as they are claimed as novelties, but when they are sold in a direct manner for sex, then trouble ensues.
• Also in Texas, make sure those "novelty" vibrators and dildos don't add up - if a member of a household owns more than five fun toys, off to jail they go.
• And in Massachusetts the sexual groundwork is plain and simple - sell a dildo, or an item of "self abuse" as they like to call them, do five years in jail. Ouch.
Source: The State News
