Congratulations MSU. It seems that we have officially become a worthwhile institution. You know how I can tell? Nike is here. Now that weve sold ourselves to this sponsorship, our athletes can run, swim, tackle, shoot and kick with true green pride. Now we have world-class sports for a world-class institution. Reebok was never quite good enough, especially since our good friends at the University of Michigan had Nike, right?
So how did we get so lucky, anyway? What was it that brought the swooshtika - yes, a Michael Moore term - to MSU? Was it the fact that we won the Citrus Bowl in Florida? Was it because our basketball team became NCAA champions this year? That would make sense, huh?
Its neither. Would you like to know why its here? Apparently our university has made a game out of picking through U-Ms garbage, because thats where we found Nike.
Guess who was No. 2 on Nikes Michigan list? The other school 60 miles down the road, waiting with open arms. I dont know about anybody else, but Im embarrassed. The first time I walked past the Student Book Store and noticed the Nike-clad mannequins crying for help in the windows, my heart sank into my stomach. I had no idea that Nike was sponsoring MSU, I had no idea that our university would let Nike sponsor us.
Its really great that weve been given the opportunity to buy clothes made by a starving 7-year-old. Im so glad that what I would pay for a Nike MSU sweatshirt could probably feed that child for about half a year. It all makes so much sense to me.
We have some options, kids. We could sit back and let Nike stay. Thats easy. We could stand up and kick them out. Thats a worthwhile challenge. Ill be standing, and if anybody cares to join me youre more than welcome to do so. Dont get caught sitting back and being fed what they want you to eat.
And then theres The Gap.