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Sexile: how to give your roommate the hint

November 5, 2014

Your significant other comes into town and you haven’t seen each other for a while, but your roommate doesn’t have any plans for the day and is perfectly fine with staying in the room all day. How do you give your roommate the hint?

“Sexiling” your roommate can sometimes be a difficult task. But, there are several different approaches you can take to get that much-needed alone time.

Give a fair warning

When possible, let your roommate know ahead of time so they can have enough time plan out their day to avoid the room during a set period. Don’t just kick out your roommate unexpectedly while they’re in the middle of doing something productive such as studying for a big exam.

Odds are they will be more willing to change their schedule if you let them know a designated time to hit up the library rather than the room.

Learn their schedule

Unless your roommate decides to not go to class, their class schedule is your biggest lifesaver. Hours on end of alone time — leaving plenty of time to get a little frisky. No asking required. Just make sure things don’t go on for too long — remember your roommate has a key to your room too.

Establish code

You’re cuddling with your sweetheart on your uncomfortable futon and your roommate is oblivious to the PDA and continues to watch Netflix on their laptop. Before your hook-up comes over, agree on a code word or phrase to throw in a casual conversation so they know when it’s their time to leave, such as “Man, I really want pizza right now.”

Bribe them

Not matter how nicely you ask them, sometimes your roommate won’t be so willing to just get up and leave. What’s in it for them? To persuade them to leave, offer to take get them lunch the next day (because who doesn’t like food?) or offer to do a chore they hate, such as cleaning the bathroom.

Create signals

Your sweetheart is looking good. Hormones are running high. Feelings can’t be resisted. There’s no time to get permission from your roommate or give proper warning. Locking the door will only slightly delay an awkward altercation. To make it clear to your roommate, throw a sock on the doorknob or put a subtle sign on the door saying something such as “Do Not Disturb.” If you really need a quick solution if you’re living in a suite-style dorm, pop a dresser drawer open to block the doorway.

Although it may be frustrating or awkward to throw your roommate out, just remember to use your time wisely, don’t be rude and be reasonable.

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