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'The mental attacks are stronger when I'm by myself': Voices of Color host Anti-Domestic Violence Rally at Capitol

October 2, 2020
Participants of the State of Michigan Domestic Violence Rally speaking at booths on Thursday, October 1, 2020. (Di'Amond Moore)
Participants of the State of Michigan Domestic Violence Rally speaking at booths on Thursday, October 1, 2020. (Di'Amond Moore)

Content warning: Contains information about domestic violence.

In the recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, survivor Sandra Delacruz shared her story Thursday evening on the steps of the Michigan Capitol. She talked about physical and emotional attacks from her abuser, as well as her difficulty with a lack of court resources.

As the COVID-19 pandemic continues and people are encouraged to stay inside, individuals who live with violent partners or household members are facing an even more dangerous situation in their homes.

"The mental attacks are stronger when I'm by myself so I feel like I have to be around somebody at all times to feel safe. That's sad," Sandra Delacruz said. "So I'm just standing here today hoping that my story will help me to heal and that I can move forth and raise my children."

An advocate group for the awareness and prevention of domestic violence, Voices of Color, hosted a rally Thursday at the Capitol to "Celebrate Michigan’s Survivors & Honor Those Lost to Domestic Violence." Several speakers discussed how survivors could be better supported in Michigan and where the domestic violence issues stem from, during the rally.

"Everything really is political. It is political," the rally's Emcee Marshall Kilgore said. "We do need people within the legislature who would not only support but reform policy that really fights for domestic violence, awareness and change."

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Attorney Jennifer Paine said she plays three roles as an advocate, an attorney and a survivor of domestic violence. She said it is important to recognize that domestic violence is not only physical violence.

"It's financial abuse, abuse of property, psychological abuse — it's domestic terrorism," Paine said. "It means love bombing, gaslighting, abusing the court process. As advocates (and) speakers, we need to make more people aware that domestic violence doesn't mean just getting hit, or getting hurt. It's not something you get over."

Paine also encouraged everyone to find their Personal Protection Order (PPO) office. Information on Ingham County PPO can be found here. Paine works for Pinnacle Family Law and offered her services to survivors.

"If you are a victim or survivor, we do all of our work for you for free anywhere in the state of Michigan," Paine said. "And if you're outside of the state of Michigan, I will find somebody for you. Call me. Call my office, if I can't help you, I will find somebody who will."

One rally organizer also read off numerous names of domestic abuse survivors and had a moment of silence for those lost.

Sen. Adam Hollier, D-Detroit, said domestic violence is not a women's issue.

"This is a men's issue. This is an issue where men are committing violence against women, against children and against other men and trans people like this, this is an issue that men have to step up," Hollier said. "It happens to women, it happens to children, it happens to trans individuals, it happens to gay, straight, lesbian, it happens to everyone. The only common denominator is most of the people doing it are men."

Voices of Color was founded by Tanesha Ash-Shakoor J.D. who said it is important that domestic violence resources work together.

"I have found that when we're doing this together, we are so much more victorious when we work together versus us trying to do it individually," Ash-Shakoor said.

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