For everyone out there who still is single and plans on staying that way for many, many years, you’re not alone.

Maybe it’s because my mom and dad waited nearly a decade before they officially tied the knot, or maybe it’s because I watched “Friends” almost everyday when I was growing up, but my vision for myself never included marrying while I was in college. I always pictured myself living in a New York flat with my girlfriends, dating a slew of, for the most part, nice and interesting guys until the perfect one finally landed on my doorstep.

I’m a skeptic by nature. I don’t believe in love at first sight, and I don’t believe there’s only “one special someone” out there for me. After dating throughout college, I can assure everyone that’s true. I’ve dated a few guys who left me questioning whether there’s still good in this world, but for the most part, I’ve met a lot of really good people who, for whatever reason, weren’t meant to be in my life. And that’s OK.

Dating has allowed me to meet people and get a taste of what I like and don’t like. Until you date a variety of different people, it’s hard to tell exactly what kind of person really makes you happy. In high school, I always imagined myself with a hipster musician, with a cigarette constantly hanging out of his mouth, until I realized I really hate awkwardly standing in the audience along with the other groupie girlfriends. I’d do it again for someone I really care about, but it’s not No. 1 on my list of priorities anymore.

I know myself better now, and now when I meet someone I want to stay with longer than a few months, it won’t be as difficult or scary.

My first long-distance relationship was miserable. My boyfriend lived halfway across the country, and all I could think about was how awful it was to be apart from him. Now I know I absolutely hate long distance, but a two-hour drive seems like a cake walk. The experience saved me a lot of heartbreak and helped me move on when I know from the start things likely won’t work out.

I’m not the same person I was in high school — none of us are. There’s something to be said to learning and growing with someone else, but that’s not for everyone. Sometimes as you get older, it’s better to move on and keep up the search rather than stay comfortable. Looking back, I would never get back together with my high school boyfriends. That’s likely true for nearly everyone. We’re all in a different place now, and it’s perfectly fine to look for someone new who’s going through similar experiences.

The point is, for anyone who’s the third or fifth wheel when you meet your friends and their partners for dinner at Dublin Square Irish Pub, don’t sweat it.

As great as that seems, sometimes it’s better to date different people now and know for certain that when you finally meet the right person, it’s going to last.

Summer Ballentine is the State News opinion editor. Reach her at sballentine@statenews.com.