Today, April 3, marks the one-month-remaining point in the semester. The last day of finals week is exactly one month from today.

I can’t wait.

I think I’m a little abnormal in this respect. I know a lot of people here at MSU view the end of the semester as kind of a sad thing, depending on what their plans are for the summer.

I, on the other hand, am very much looking forward to the day when I no longer have to go to class every day and can relax a bit at home. As much as I love MSU, I live by the creed of “Sweet Home Chicago.”

All that aside, there’s still a month left. There’s still more than three weeks worth of classes and a week of finals. Here are some things I’m doing as I try — and most likely fail — to stay focused as the semester winds down.

1. Irresponsible amounts of caffeine

Caffeine being the drug of choice on college campuses, I am inclined to offer you naked disbelief if you tell me you don’t abuse caffeine on a regular basis. I am no different.

However, as the semester starts to draw to a close and the apathy sets in, I think it’s time to up my prescription. Papers and final projects and work and class require an energy I find to be in short supply, so I’m responding with a few extra cups of coffee and aluminum cans by the score.

(Full disclosure: the monetary value of my desk is higher than the GDP of some small countries because of all the cans currently sitting on it. God bless America.)

Ostensibly, this energy burst will go toward accomplishing all the work I still have to do. But I suspect I’ll also end up using it to power my late-night video game endeavors. “Call of Duty,” anyone?

2. Constructive procrastinating

I know, I know. It sounds silly. But I’m not the first to try using procrastination as a tool to get things done. Our very own U.S. Congress has done it!

When the debt ceiling first became a major issue in 2011, Congress devised the sequester, a package of harsh federal spending cuts and tax hikes that would — theoretically — force them to deal with the issue of debt and deficit before the sequester would take effect. In essence, they said, “Hey, we’ve got this thing we really need to do, but we’ll do it later.”

And, as we all know, that worked perfectly and did not backfire in any way. I’m sure it will work great for you, too. If it doesn’t, I promise you a full refund for this free column. Guaranteed!

3. “Studying”

In the time-honored tradition of college students everywhere, I pledge to you now that I will study* my behind off in the coming month. I will pull my grades up and be totally prepared for finals.

*Actual study materials not included. Offer not valid in the confines of my dorm room or really anywhere on campus. Side effects may include excessive video game playing, increased napping and extreme Internet surfing. Due dates in mirror are closer than they appear. Please drink responsibly.

4. Tweeting about how great I am at studying

How will people know that I’m learning things if I don’t stop every 10 seconds to tell them? Isn’t it my civic duty to make sure everyone who follows me on Twitter is 100 percent up to date on my progress in learning things? I obviously can’t let them go on with their daily lives without knowing how well my studying is going, can I?

Oh wait, sorry, I spelled that wrong. That should be “How well my watching of “One Tree Hill’ is going. My mistake. My finger must have slipped. Yeah, I watch “One Tree Hill.” What of it?

5. Eating

I really don’t have a joke here. Something about keeping my strength up for my marathon “One Tree Hill” sessions, I guess. Does that work? I ingest quite a bit of food already, is what I’m saying here. Coming down the stretch of the semester won’t change that.

In my defense, I am a comparatively large human. Who happens to be very fond of food.

So yeah. Keep your heads up, Spartans. Your checks for $0.00 are in the mail.

Don’t spend it all in one place.

Caleb Nordgren is a staff writer at The State News and a journalism junior. Reach him at nordgren@msu.edu.