While driving past the MSU Federal Credit Union on the way back from a retreat, a knot formed in my stomach and a Winston Churchill furrow appeared in my brow. I didn’t want to be here.

One could argue that perhaps I have never liked being here, but that is not true. I left for this retreat a Grand River Avenue-loving Spartan, and came back Judi Dench. I could only deduce the reason was that until I left, I didn’t know what stopping was.

Distaste for Henry David Thoreau had led me to believe that I would hate his lifestyle of freedom and rest, yet retreating proved me entirely wrong. Coming back to school after a restful weekend of schedule-free bliss reminded me of the life I live here. It is one of scheduled friendships, power walking and Starbucks VIA coffee. And all of these are gross.

It is safe to assume the majority of us have spent unfortunate amounts of time playing “The Sims.” For those who spent time more wisely, it is basically a game of virtual life in which you are the boss. As a kid I remember scheduling my Sim for a series of pertinent tasks of life including DDR, fortune telling and building snowmen. Then, in this actively engaging game, I would sit back and watch. It was hilarious. These dignified Sims would walk around with an air of utmost solemnity as they approached their momentous tasks, and then they would hop on the electric bull in their living room. In my 12-year-old superiority I would belittle the Sims with pretentious laughter and a “What do you do that is so important?”

Yet on campus I see the wide, awkward steps of a hurried freshman, Post-It’s No. 1 customer, along with the cell phone cyclists forgetting to steer, and the haughty words of my youth echo back. I can’t help but think, “What do we do that is so important?”

I need not tell you the effects of being too busy. The American Institute of Stress reported that 85 percent of college students feel stressed on a daily basis. Grab those handbills from Olin Health Center and learn that fatigue, acid reflux and hair loss all are consequences of stress. As someone not ready for balding, I fear those repercussions. Need I remind you of Blue Man Group?

Yes, physical factors are unfortunate, but something far less discussed is what the physical factors are signifying: Emotional factors.

In my bathroom lies Frederick Douglass’ narrative. General leisure reading has had to be doubled up with bathroom time. Sleeping has been removed and restful rides on buses are rationalized as an equal fix. Showers are spent studying notes put into Ziploc bags — that is, if I shower at all (yes, feel bad for my friends).

What a horrifying multitasking world we have created. Doubling should only happen in a shower if you live in a shower, and only Cosmo Kramer is that brilliant.

I spent my high school years the way I know many have, with no time for my family, friends or myself, and I was determined that I wouldn’t let that happen in college. Yet I have.

Activity is so deceiving. We have this notion that the more we fill our time, the more meaningful our life is, but I challenge each one of you to recall the most meaningful points in your life. I know mine seemingly are the most meaningless. They are runs in the rain, Monty Python marathons and fort-building with roomies, beautiful nothings I could never put on a résumé.

Breathless and frazzled I went to a meeting last week and the kid next to me said, “You know, Moses and Elmo didn’t go to college.” After much laughter I realized he was right. I’m no better, with my jam-packed schedule, than the person feeding ducks in the Red Cedar River.

Steinbeck sums it up in “Travels With Charley”: “ … I have always lived violently, drunk hugely, eaten too much, or not at all, slept around all the day, or missed two nights of sleeping, worked too hard and too long in glory, or sobbed for a time in utter laziness. … I did not want to surrender fierceness for a small gain in yardage.”

Consider what brings you joy in life, and then, once in a while, drop the schedule, forget the “yardage” and live fiercely.

Casey McCorry is a State News guest columnist and English senior. Reach her at mccorryc@msu.edu.