Iran just checked off No. 1 on the "things-to-piss-off-the-West" list.

After ignoring constant U.N. pleas for nuclear disarmament, its president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, thought he would push the diplomatic red button and kidnap 15 British soldiers. Even though British Prime Minister Tony Blair condemned the kidnapping as illegal, Iran claims the soldiers were invading its territory.

Meanwhile, to make matters worse here at home, Congress passed a bill that would demand the return of all American troops from Iraq by fall 2008. This is seen by many conservatives as a viciously opportunistic move by the Democrats to malign the Republicans' war efforts. President Bush himself said this was nothing but political "theater," since the bill would ultimately prove ineffective by his veto.

This is pertinent to the current situation in Iran because many Republicans feel wavering in Iraq only emboldens the Iranians, who have been getting increasingly daring lately. To some ultra-neoconservatives, the Democrats' actions almost border on treason. According to a lot of sensational news stories, this will lead to an epic showdown between righteous Republicans and evil Democrats — it'll be just like the book of Revelations, except none of the Democrats get to ride dragons. Nancy Pelosi and Ahmadinejad then will start a passionate love affair that will produce no one less than the Antichrist himself — so says Fox News, anyway.

In all this confusion, many people see Iran's latest provocation as nothing less than a threat to a nation's sovereignty — a test of its political toughness. In fact, some see this latest act as no less than an act of war.

Yeah, right. An act of war is when your fleet gets bombed or your country gets invaded, or when something else puts hundreds or more lives at risk — definitely not simply kidnapping 15 people who are in perfectly good health. Besides, going to war over 15 people simply isn't logical. In war, thousands die. Are thousands of lives lost worth getting back 15 soldiers just to save face? I hardly think this handful of people are worth it. Unless these guys have the secret to immortality or discovered the ark of the covenant, let's take our time!

That is why the Democrats' latest decision on Iraq doesn't seem that bad. After all, the military option didn't exactly do wonders. The bill shows the beginning of a less war-like foreign policy guided more by strategy and forethought. Diplomacy before war isn't a sign of weakness — it's a sign of political intelligence that scares our enemies.

After all, let's not forget a war is exactly what Iran wants. Let's not forget that less than a year ago, they took a handful of Israeli soldiers captive into Lebanon. As Israel bombed Lebanon's infrastructure, Iran used the chaos as an opportunity to sneak its troops into the country and flare up anti-American sentiments. Whenever any civilian was hurt, they were helped by Iranian-funded terrorist groups. The more chaos Iran gets, the more powerful it gets. And if the British make such a bold move as to start bombing Iran, the rest of the Middle Eastern countries most certainly will try to come to its aid. It'll be like fire catching in a forest — no one could say where it would stop.

And in the end, it all would be about 15 perfectly healthy people. This is ridiculously, ludicrously stupid. The Democrats' decision for diplomacy is a lot more patriotic than the decision to support open warfare, whether it be in Iraq or Iran. It truly is ultimately in America's best interests to stay clear of violence. So what if the Iranians keep the soldiers for a year or more — that's still hardly worth the lives and billions of money. Deep down, wanting war or not, the Iranians know this.

This is exactly why war won't happen. President Bush and Tony Blair may say these are acts of war, but they are not; they are nothing more than a bluff in a political game of poker. It's time we put our poker faces on and stop giving our opponents the upper hand by irrationally giving away our cards.

It's time to start playing the diplomatic game again. It's time to start playing poker.

Isaac Deville is an MSU English junior and State News columnist. Reach him at devillei@msu.edu.