By Erik Adams
For The State News

As an avid viewer of the late VH1 show "Pop-Up Video," I know that LL Cool J is an acronym for "Ladies Love Cool James."

As someone who has heard LL's new album "Todd Smith," I now feel that moniker may be truer in reverse.

Over the course of "Todd Smith," LL finds himself making legit claims of female admiration while also begging for in-club hookups and forgiveness from ex-girlfriends. But after 12 albums, it might be time to retire the lover's rap routine.

"I've Changed" is a post-breakup plea that goes from melancholic to creepy real fast. "On my knees 'til they bleed to prove my love again" isn't exactly boom-box-outside-the-girl's-window territory. When he pledges that love on the altar in "I Do," he discovers new levels of cheese. The emotions are there — they're just not well-translated.

And though he says the temptation they present is a "mutha," he's reluctant to return the advances he gets from the ladies. It's a strange dichotomy made even stranger by the Christian imagery that occasionally crops up in the album's rhymes.

In spite of — or maybe because of — the longevity he touts on more boisterous tracks such as "It's LL and Santana" and "What You Want," LL's nonlover lyrics rarely wander outside the perimeters of cars, jewels and skills.

At the end of the robotic booty-shaker "Control Myself," he just flat-out runs out of words, settling for buzzing syllables put to the rhythm of the song's hook.

More cynical listeners could view the album's lengthy guest list — a hip-hop, R & B and gospel "who's who?" and "who's that?" — as LL's way of cementing his legacy and sustaining his relevance. For the most part, they'd be right, as these cameos do little else for their respective tracks.

Those seated behind the sound board save "Todd Smith" from completely bombing. The producers assembled for the album — The Neptunes, Trackmasters and Jermaine Dupri — buff their tracks to a poppy sheen, but don't inject anything particularly innovative.

Being one of rap's most enduring performers, it's sad to think "Todd Smith" is the best album LL Cool J can deliver in 2006. He can surround himself with hot producers and rising talent, but he's not making history anymore.

He might be history, though.