On the eve of presidential elections it usually happens - the campaign-end surprise. One or both candidates will pull out some powerhouse, earth-shattering dirt on their competition.

In 2000, Democrats served up President Bush's drunk-driving record to sway voters days before the election. Supreme Court decisions to determine 2000's true winner aside, four years of Bush later, the tactic obviously didn't affect the change some people hoped for.

It's not that American voters don't deserve the truth - they do. But surprise announcements have the stunning history of being effectively useless.

Maybe they've already voted with an absentee ballot. Maybe negative campaign ads have worn away their sanity. If that's the case, surprise announcements just add another brick to the pile. Certain scientific principles lead us to believe that the answer is much, much more simple.

Voters have already - and finally - made up their minds.

This time around, voters won't operate any differently. Today, even the undecided voter will have to finally make up his or her mind. Hopefully, most of them will vote on the candidates' platforms and pressing issues. As usual, past indiscretions won't play the key role in the election.

Last minute surprises are a cowardly practice. It's like trying to pummel the wind with your fists - a fit void of potency. They don't work. They don't add intelligent dialogue to the American political scene. They won't inspire a mass exodus of changing political allegiances.

All Bush and Sen. John Kerry need to do is let the elections work. Just let the magic happen; have faith in your constituency and don't whip a monkey wrench in the gears of progress. The American electoral process will work just the same.

People, even right now, are going to the polls. They know what they want, and they'll make that voting lever give it to them. Half-hearted opposition will not stay the tide of the truly determined voter.

This year, our political system demands that the best man, in the combined minds of voters and the electoral college, wins. No amount of nudging, or even violent shoving should change your mind as a voter.

Ideally, by this time most voters have researched both Bush and Kerry. You know who you want to vote for and why. If you voted Republican last time around, chances are 2000's campaign-end surprises didn't phase you. Even if you voted for Al Gore or Ralph Nader, or even if you're a first-timer, don't let rumors change your mind.

They're not worth it.

Pre-election voter jitters, whether they come from a campaign-end surprise announcement or not, aren't anything to fear. Just get to the polls and "git 'er done." We promise, you'll feel better after casting that ballot.

After the election, when the smoke clears, you will have the pride of knowing you stuck by your man, fulfilled your civic duty and voted in support of the issues you wanted.

That's really all anyone, especially the candidates, should ask from voters. And it's what you should demand from yourself. Now, go on. Git 'er done.