Race cars carry corporate names like Pennzoil and Tide. The Detroit Tigers play in the corporate named Comerica Park.
And now for just $500,000, a company or individual, can put its brand on a baby boy.
Jason Black and his wife Frances Schroeder have decided to auction off the name of their soon-to-be son.
They are looking for a corporate sponsor to pay at least $500,000 dollars to name their bouncing baby boy. The auction is taking place on eBay and Yahoo!
As of Friday, there were no bidders.
Black and Schroeder live with their two young daughters in New York City, where he works as an editor. Schroeder stays at home with their daughters.
Black makes enough money that his wife doesn’t have to work, so it’s not as though they are in desperate need of money. But like most Americans, he wants a couple extra bucks.
They plan to use the money to buy a new house and save the rest for college. So at least young “Draino” Black will have an education, if he makes it that far.
Hopefully, he won’t crack up under the pressure of having a name like Heavenly Ham before he graduates from high school.
Almost everybody has a story of how they were made fun of during elementary school. Many names can be twisted into something humorous, but when your name is Vagisil, you don’t stand a chance against ridicule.
Black calls this money-making scheme an opportunity. It’s a “trust fund” for his children’s future.
Still, after being teased by his peers, it’s hard to explain to a crying 6-year-old why his ridiculous name is actually an opportunity.
Jason Black is a sellout, and hopefully his son will realize it. Going beyond money, Black has broken the rules of what many people may consider good parenting.
Appearing on CNN, Black said that “maybe there would be a way so that we could create an actual financial benefit for our girls, our daughters and for our soon-to-be-born son.”
It’s more like a financial benefit from his unborn son. Not only is he making money for his kids, he’s profiting off his son.
Black says that with good parenting, his son can lead a normal and healthy life, though it’s hard to imagine how a boy who was named by Virgin Records could lead a normal life.
How does one balance good parenting with exposure to the media and public opinion?
Besides the boy himself, naming a person after your company may not necessarily be a good idea.
Why would a company like Microsoft (the grandmother’s choice) want to name a kid? It doesn’t seem like sound advertising, especially if the kid turns out to be a bad seed.
Luckily, the family has ruled out sponsorships from gun and cigarette companies. At least they have standards.
In the end, the kid is the victim. He has no say in this matter, and has to deal with whatever he’s dealt until his 18th birthday - when one can legally change his or her name.
Of course, if no one wants a shot at the $500,000 minimum bidding price, The State News would be willing to name him for something in the ballpark of, say, $20.
