I did it. I gave in. I never thought I’d get this desperate, but I did.

I got in the car and rode down Grand River to Barnes and Noble. I gave them the money and they handed over the goods. I walked out of the store ashamed.

I bought CliffsNotes. (Sorry Dr. Kroeg.)

Sure, this is nothing new to the college scene. It’s not even new to high school, and in some extreme cases, junior high. CliffsNotes have saved the academic lives of millions. But, I never expected them to save me.

I always said I would never be one of “those” people; one of the people who didn’t do the work and got away with it by using what I viewed as an organized and nationally published form of cheating. I would never let myself get to the point where I would have to rely on the watered-down, summarized and pre-analyzed version.

But I did. I am one of “them.” And I’m not nearly as ashamed as I thought I would be.

I think there comes a time in everyone’s life when you just have too much on your plate. Sometimes it’s your own fault. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do to stop it. In my case, it’s a little of both. Work and classes keep me plenty busy, but I’ve found myself procrastinating more and more.

As much as I try to make myself sit down and write a diary entry in Russian, read a chapter of economics, call sources for my journalism stories and read a novel all in one sitting, most of the time, it just isn’t going to happen.

I start each weekend convinced that I will catch up with all of the things I should have done during the week. I start each Monday thinking about how much sleep I’m going to lose writing that entry, skimming that chapter, waiting for those sources to call back and finishing that book.

It’s a vicious cycle, and I’m not alone, I’m sure.

I’ve been telling myself I would have this book done for about two weeks now, and each day the deadline moves back. It’s at the point that I can’t make excuses anymore. And, I’m beginning to realize that unless I suspend all other activities including eating and sleeping for the next few days, I will still not have it read in time.

Even after I realized there was no hope of finishing the book before the class discusses it and the essay is due, it still took me a while to break down and buy the CliffsNotes.

Something deep inside of me refused to give in.

But, finally, after the urging of my friends and even my mother, I relented. Given all the time in the world, I would have read the book in its entirety. I’ve enjoyed it so far, I just can’t find the time for it. Besides, they print CliffsNotes for a reason, right?

I certainly don’t plan on making this a habit. CliffsNotes are a great tool in a bind, but aren’t something you should rely on for all your reading needs. I just never wanted to be the person to use them at all, ever, for any reason. Besides my fear of failure is a fear of not succeeding correctly.

I can at least take solace in knowing that when the time comes for me to support myself in the job market, my prospective employer won’t be asking “did you read all of Jane Eyre or did you just buy the CliffsNotes?”

I suppose I really shouldn’t feel so guilty for something students do all the time and have been doing for years. Everyone needs a helping hand every so often to get through stuff, especially college.

Without study aides and the occasional set of borrowed notes, not too many of us would make it through college. Some of our professors may not have even gotten through college without a little help here and there. Even so, it’s just really hard to accept that sometimes.

Cutting a few corners does not make someone a bad person. As long as you are getting the big picture, it doesn’t really matter if you don’t know what the third word of the second paragraph on page 117 is.

I may not be a model student. I may not be able to get it all done the way I’d like to. But, I’m getting it done and I’m learning what I need to know. I’m only one person who has 24 hours each day to do 50 hours of work. Something has to give, and it’s not going to kill me if I take a few shortcuts.

Until they make CliffsNotes for life, that’s the way it’s going to have to be.

Michonne Omo, State News opinion writer, can be reached at omomicho@msu.edu.