Wednesday, April 24, 2024

LETTER: ELPD botched my sexual assault case

A Letter to the East Lansing Police Department:

During my four years at Michigan State, I have been required to listen to numerous talks regarding sexual assault and the importance of reporting it.

Every time, it was reiterated that if I were to be sexually assaulted, and I would report it, I would have MSU, the MSUPD, as well as the ELPD on my side to assist me in whatever way I needed. It made feel comforted to know that if anything ever were to happen to me, I would have so much support.

Unfortunately, I have since learned that this is not the case.

In October of 2014 I was sexually assaulted. I was in denial for hours that it even happened, until my close friend opened my eyes to the truth, and took me to the hospital to have a rape kit done. That experience in itself is extremely traumatic.

First, I had to tell the person working the front desk of the ER that I needed to have that done, and the look they gave me make me want to run and leave. Then, they brought me to a nurse, and I had to tell her minimal details about what happened. Then the nurse tells me that someone from the MSU Counseling Center will be coming to talk to me.

Eventually she arrived, as did the doctor. They gave me a choice: I could choose to have a rape kit done, and press charges against the guy who did this to me, or I could just have an exam done. After weighing my options with them, I decided to proceed with pressing charges, as I did not want this to happen to another woman.

To this day, I completely regret that choice.

I had to tell the doctor every detail of what happened, and then she examined me. An exam for a rape kit is not the same thing as going to the woman doctor. She had to completely look me over, to look for bruises anywhere.

They had to take samples from multiple parts of my body to try to find DNA. And then she had to complete the standard exam. It’s a humiliating experience, but the doctor was extremely supportive, and I am grateful for her.

Once the exam was completed, I had to meet with a detective from the East Lansing Police Department, and share my story once again with him. He was nice, and tried to be understanding, but didn’t seem to quite get it.

Once he took my statement he told me that someone would be in contact with me shortly to get an official statement and proceed from there.

Eventually, I was contacted. I made an appointment and had to meet with a female detective and share my experience all over again with her. She was cold, and made me feel as if the assault was my fault.

She told me that a restraining order would not do any good, and that it was pointless to get one. She also told me that she wasn’t sure if they could get him for sexual assault, as it was my word against his, but that they could probably pursue charges for theft (as he stole money, my phone, and a few other belongings from me).

I was regretting my decision to file charges more and more.

That was the last time I heard from ELPD. It has been six months since I was assaulted, and they have done nothing with my case.

How do I know that? Because I still see the guy who assaulted me. I run into him at East Lansing bars at least once a month, and a couple of weeks ago saw him at my favorite late-night food joint.

He is carelessly living his life, while I still start shaking from fear at the sight of him. He will never know the pain I have been put through, because no one has told him.

But this is not about him — I cannot change him or stop him. This is about the East Lansing Police Department, and the lack of caring they have for real crimes.

They will go out of their way to give a minor an MIP, or to catch a freshman smoking weed in his room, and will be sure to follow up and show up in court. But when someone is sexually assaulted, the police are nowhere to be found.

I had heard the horror stories about campus police not following up with, or ignoring sexual assault, but I thought that an actual city police department would take it more seriously. I was wrong.

Because of the ELPD, there is a guy out there who could potentially be hurting more women, and that is not OK. The police are supposed to protect you, but I never felt more alone than when I was with any of them.

I am graduating in two weeks, and moving back home to Chicago. I will never have to see my assailant again. I am lucky. But there are countless other women out there who are not.

Women who are freshmen, and have to live on this campus for 3 more years. Women who will have to see their assailant. Women who are not able to cope with it. Women who constantly live in fear. This is not OK.

So ELPD, I challenge you to fix your sexual assault program and your officers. I challenge you to give more of a damn about real crimes, and less about 19-year-olds who drink. I challenge you to make your officers go through sensitivity training, so that no other woman has to hear, “Maybe you should watch who you bring home from the bars,” as I did.

I challenge you to be a support for victims, not another barrier. I challenge you to care.

Lauren Opeka is a creative advertising and graphic design senior at MSU.

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